How to Support Someone Who’s Struggling to Quit

“I’m going to quit smoking.” That’s what anyone determined to kick the habit might say, and you may have even heard it from someone close to you. 

While it’s great to hear, it’s important to set your expectations—this journey often isn’t straightforward. 

They may have created a detailed quit plan with you and a GP, only to relapse and light up a cigarette one day. Feeling frustrated is normal, but remember that setbacks are common. 

Instead, you can offer your genuine concern, encouragement, and patience, as these qualities are crucial for supporting someone through their quit journey.

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Need some ideas on how to better support your loved ones? Let’s explore a few ways to help.

Expressing Your Concern About Their Health

As a non-smoker, you might find it hard to grasp how nicotine addiction can sway even the most motivated smoker. When expressing your concern, it’s easy to come off as insensitive or even micromanaging. 

It can be frustrating to watch someone struggle, especially if they keep relapsing, but remember that nagging and instilling fear about the consequences of smoking won’t help. 

Doing so might make the person feel unsafe around you, causing them to shut down and refuse to listen, which is the last thing you want if you truly wish to support them.

When discussing your concerns about smoking, always approach the conversation with empathy. 

Show that you understand how nicotine addiction works and why quitting can be so difficult, even when the smoker knows the consequences. 

Most importantly, you can’t force them to quit; they need to be ready to commit to the process for it to be effective.

Helping Them Understand the Immediate Impact of Quitting

If you’ve been doing your homework on how to help your loved ones quit smoking, you might already know that within just six days of quitting, a smoker starts to notice some pretty amazing health benefits. 

This is something you might want to casually share with your friend or partner. Let them know, in a chill way, how quickly their body can start to feel better after ditching nicotine. 

It could really motivate them to take that leap, rather than just lecturing them about the dangers of smoking.

Here are a few benefits they can experience within a month or even a year of quitting:

• Restored sense of taste and smell

• Improved lung capacity and better blood oxygen levels (which are super important for nutrition)

• Increased endurance

You could also encourage them to take action. 

For example, when you’re out together, climb a long winding staircase and let them feel how much easier it is to get to the top without gasping for breath. That could be a great motivator to quit.

And, don’t forget to highlight a long-term goal they’ve always wanted to achieve.

If they dream of buying their own house, show them how much they could save by quitting smoking and how it could help them reach that goal much quicker.

Celebrate Small Victories

Celebrating a victory of any size, whether giving a small gift to commemorate the last cigarette of a motivated smoker or bringing out the party poppers after a week of being clean, improves the motivation of smokers and gives them determination to keep on keeping on.

Winning and celebrating are pleasurable activities that release dopamine in the system, which  positively reinforces the behaviour, actions, and processes in a motivated smoker and boosts their psyche and motivation to commit to kicking out smoking from their lives for good.

So, don’t think that one day or one week of being smokefree is no cause for celebration – it’s worth every cake and party popper.

Remain Patient

The motivated smoker has already beaten themselves up for having slipped up before you could even react. Again, expressing your disappointment and frustration at them will double the negative reinforcement, which can discourage them from committing to the process. 

For many supporters, it’s easy to downplay nicotine addiction without having gone through it. It’s important to know that quitters who have a year or more behind them can still mess up and light a cigarette.

While it sounds like new quitters are given a free pass to smoke whenever they want during the process, this isn’t the case. 

The idea is for supporters to be patient and empathetic toward the quitter’s thoughts and feelings before and after they lit up the cigarette. 

By understanding the motives behind their actions, it’s easy to reframe the mess-up as a learning experience and encourage them to do better next time rather than scold and judge them for their failure – an act that doesn’t achieve anything productive.

Accept That Motivated Smokers Can Still Slip Up

Still on the subject of patience and failure, supporters must accept that a smoker can still slip up even after five years or a decade of stopping smoking. More importantly, they must realise that quitting smoking is an ongoing process that continues beyond decades of kicking the habit.

Relapses can always happen to successful quitters. It could be an alcohol-laden work party or a sudden curiosity if they can control themselves even if they just had one cigarette. 

Any smoker can get tempted back after 10 or 20 years of stopping smoking. The biggest difference between long- and short-term quitters is motivation. 

A long-term smoker regrets their decision and immediately stops smoking for good once again. A short-term quitter, usually just a week or month off the ciggies, is more likely to give in completely.

The most important thing to do when a long-term smoker lights a cigarette is to listen to them and ask if what they did was wrong. If they did, do not scold them – let them know it’s okay to have made a mistake and to let go of the guilt by starting the quitting process once again.

The Importance of Professional Help

Motivation and a support system are two key elements of a successful quit journey. However, a GP is the key to ensuring the process works. 

GPs can tailor a quit journey with the smoker’s needs in mind. They can provide access to the best nicotine replacement therapy (NRT) tools a smoker might need, and are also responsible for prescribing second-line nicotine vaping products (NVPs) from pharmacies, if they assess NRTs to be ineffective for them. 

Pharmacies only carry NVPs that are made with stringent pharmaceutical standards on the manufacturing process and ingredients, are toxicologically assessed for inhalation, are locally insured, and are specifically designed to help you stop smoking.

The latest Cochrane Review found high-certainty evidence that NVPs are more effective than NRT in helping people stop smoking.

Summary

Quitting smoking is a journey equal to navigating a road full of mountains and valleys – it goes up, down, and sideways. Even the most motivated smokers will find difficulty navigating the challenges of quitting, but with a reliable support group helping them and celebrating their victories, they have the best chance of succeeding in kicking smoking out for good.

We know you’re reading this because you find it hard to support a friend or loved one struggling to quit smoking. We hope you found this informative. There’s more you can learn by going through our blog posts.

Smokefree Clinic gives you access to many medically reviewed and trustworthy resources that can inform and aid you in your path to wellness, so have a look around! 

If you’re ready to get started, Smokefree can connect you to Australian healthcare professionals who excel in helping patients quit smoking for good, including using responsible vaping products where appropriate.

Click here to book your telehealth consultation with an Australian healthcare professional and quit smoking today.

Link Reference:

• https://www.cochrane.org/CD004307/TOBACCO_can-rewards-help-smokers-quit-long-term
• https://www.cochrane.org/news/latest-cochrane-review-finds-high-certainty-evidence-nicotine-e-cigarettes-are-more-effective